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Saturday, December 5, 2015

How quickly...

How quickly things can change...
 
The day after I wrote my last 30 Days of Thanks post, my back started hurting.  I've had my back go out a couple of times--usually about once every 10 years since I was 18.  This time it didn't totally go out, but only because I've been resting like crazy.  Like laying down resting, not going anywhere resting.  It's not been as bad as in the past, but bad enough to make me miserable.  On top of that, I have a possible UTI.  I just have not felt good.  My children (Tera especially) have been such a big help.  JP has dropped off, picked up, taken them to extra special things all on top of working. 
 
Now, that I am starting to recover, I get a bit nervous.  What if I do too much and make it worse?  What if? Well, that first one is pretty much it.  So, here I lay resting after being up and about for 4 hours this morning.  I drove the kids to chess club after they helped me do grocery shopping. (Basically, I drove and paid!)  I overdid it last night at our town's tree lighting helping Tera with her Santa's Workshop project.  I was hurting, but today I'm not as bad as yesterday.
 
We've cancelled several things this week.  Things we were really looking forward to...concerts, candlelight Christmas service, some regular activities.  But my children have been troopers, disappointed troopers, but troopers just the same. 
 
I'm pacing myself through the recovery mode.  Some activities are still up in the air.  I know how bad it can be, so I definitely don't want to push myself over the edge. 

Anyway, you would think after the 30 days of thanks, I'd be cheerful and Pollyannaish.  But I have to admit I've had a hard time being thankful the last few days.  I've let the pity party sink in a bit.  I did jokingly say that maybe this is God's way of sparing us the horrible stomach bug we seem to get every year at Christmas. 
 
How quickly  we can fall out of the habit of something.   I am thankful that although I struggle...I am struggling...I will struggle with things that God, Himself doesn't change.  He knows me and loves me anyway.  How quickly, He can work in a situation.  How quickly, He can heal.  How quickly, He can show us His grace and mercy.
 
How quickly?  Instantly!